Poetry 4: Self-Denial

Self-Denial

It's something I never thought I could do!
But at long last, I've done it!
With aplomb. With success. With flying colors!

In this world modern trivalities and complexities
The biggest lie I can tell myself is that I can still exist minus
YOU!

Definitely I know fromt he abyss of my heart I AM WRONG!
For sure you know I am a liar

When I never accepted you to be a vital part of me.

For you say you were born for ME.

You allege we're tailor-made for each other.

You clearly lay down your cards on the table,
The table that treasures the threshold of the love
You had for me all through those years.
Now I miss you.

For I know I can never ever have you again.
It's too ironical to acknowledge the mutuality of our feelings
Now that you are gone -
Gone FOREVER!

If only I could turn back the hands of time...
If I could only reverse the days gone past us...
If only I relive my life all over...
I'd choose to live it with you
And nobody else.

You may not be my knight in shinning armor.
You may not be the nectar and ambrocia kings long for.
You may not be the potion lovestuck guys crave for.
For you are not perfect.

But perfectly you fit to a T what I desire most in my man.
You stammer, you grope for words
Everytime you say I'm special to you
And I love it tenderly.

Your eyes glow in amazement everytime you see me.
And I dearly treasure it-in my heart.

Now I hate the thought of having lost you
I deny myself for being too conceited and boastful.
Now I shed these tears for you